51. Abandon your blog for two weeks to whimsically gallivant around Ireland.

You’ve had enough of the internet. ENOUGH. Insipid Facebook statuses make you want to throw your computer out the window. LOLcats are yowling their way into your increasingly poor-grammared dreams. YouTube is torture. Accuweather is never correct anymore. Google is…well okay, Google’s cool. But if you have to listen to one more Nickelback song blasting out of a MySpace page while pink ducklings dance about a fluorescent orange background, you’re going to set fire to the nearest Apple Store, provided it’s not equipped with a spring-loaded, fire-extinguisher-wielding Steve Jobs. You’re not quite sure how humanity has gotten this far, but you’re almost positive it involves a hell of a lot of dumb luck.

So you’re packing up. Time to blow this popsicle stand. Time for a journey to a land of shamrocks, potatoes, and Colin Farrell. Time to frolic about in the rain and dangle headfirst off a cliff for no good reason. Time to get drunk on Guinness and pass out on top of a sheep.

Time to go to Ireland.

But wait! Won’t that be expensive? Isn’t this a terrible time to travel, what with the economy sucking the way it does? How are you going to make next month’s rent if you’ve stopped working for two weeks? And where in the hell did you last put your passport??

It doesn’t matter! Now is no time for common sense! Pack your bags, kidnap your favorite sibling, fashion a rudimentary but passable government-issued ID, and get on the friggin’ plane! Oh, don’t give a second thought to your precious blog. Pay it no mind as it sits there, withered and dejected, wasting away to nothing while you full-on make out with the Blarney Stone. It’ll be right here when you get back, tumbleweeds blustering through, cobwebs gunking up the dashboard, blog stats plummeting to Mariana Trench levels. That’s just fine. No, you go have your fun. Say hi to the leprechauns. Bring back a goat or two. Punch Bono in the face.

So if you want to suck at life, abandon your blog for two weeks to whimsically gallivant around Ireland. Think of it as research. There are plenty of ways to suck at life in another country, and you’re damn well going to test out and report back on each and every one of them.

9 Comments »

  1. Lisa said

    Does this mean you’re gone for two weeks!?! Oh no!! :(

  2. damon said

    I prefer to just suck in the continental U.S.
    Trying to suck globally is best left to the professionals. ;)

  3. Hmmm… I think someone figured out how to suck at life in Ireland. Hee!

  4. theatrechick said

    So whatever happened to this blog? I do believe it has been longer than two weeks.

    • treesaw74 said

      Hmmm I Wish it would come back again. Thanks for blogging before Ireland.

  5. Miss Daisy said

    Friday Night Lights is so lonely without you.

  6. That’s actually a really good idea. i hope my life sucks.

  7. Coco said

    Yeah…it’d definitely be nice to see some more posts. This is a seriously hirarious blog.

  8. Isuckatlife said

    Found this post on Google as I didnt know what to search for on the internett anymore.. Oh, how I wanna just do it with all the money I dont have :) Thanks man, going to Ireland this Christmas. thanks for a good laugh, appreciated!

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